our war: the lighter side

Let me break the piercing silence here with a couple of jokes circulating around. Making up jokes in the face of adversity is a phenomenon for social scientists to analyze. I will not even venture there. Some of the humor is lost to the translation so I will try to translate those that are least affected. As with all local jokes, you may have to be familiar with the local politics to really appreciate the humor. Anyway here goes:

  • Minister Nayla Mouawad has threatened the opposition forces that she would go on national TV without makeup if they do not withdraw their militia from the streets.
  • The opposition demonstrators protested against the government, calling for its resignation, because it allowed the import of bad quality tires that do not produce very thick dark smoke when burnt.
  • Carlos Edde forces have taken over the amusement park in Beirut.
  • The opposition took over the ministry of education and forged a brevet certificate (grade 9) for minister Suleiman Franjieh.
  • The Super Star singers (program on Future TV) have surrendered their places to Firqat el Wilaya (Hezbollah related choral group)
  • Michel Mouawad is giving a press conference on Tiji channel (for children).

And if you come across more, feel free to add here.
Stay safe.



  1. bech · · Reply

    wow people are really creative and fast. I like the music one very much.

  2. SillyBahrainiGirl · · Reply

    Brilliant post M! It cracked me up! While doing it for a round up for GVO, I couldn’t help but feel bitter as I tagged it as both Humour and War and Conflict ;(

  3. theinnercircle · · Reply

    hahahahaha… very funny. I’m glad the average Lebanese still has it in him/her.

  4. Anonymous · · Reply

    The opposition had demanded the government to name one of the country’s landmarks after one of their key figures. So the government quickly renamed the country’s largest dam; “Sadd el-Ayr-Aoun”

  5. It’s great M. how you could make us laugh in the face of misery and pain 🙂

  6. Anonymous · · Reply

    Do you know how Future TV caught fire?Chef Ramzi forgot to turn off the stove.

  7. ms. tee · · Reply

    This is an old one, but did you know that Nayla Muawwad and Amin Jumayyil use the same hairdresser?

  8. Ms Levantine · · Reply

    Good ones. Whatever happened to Abul Abed lately? I have not heard much from him.MM.

  9. Liliane · · Reply

    I love the war/bad situation in Lebanon, jokes! They’re just so funny and light as you put it! I have some in Arabic, maybe you’d want to translate them. I received them by Email:تمكن مقاتلو سمير جعجع من احتلال لعبة السيارات في مدينة الملاهي , وتخوف مناستعمال هذه السيارات للهجوم على براد البوظةالمعارضة تصرح: إحصل على شكن برجر مع كل بج ماك ميل. الكمية محدودة والعرض ساري حتى إنتهاء المظاهرة السلميةصادر الجيش مخزنا للأسلحة تابع للتيار الوطني الحر يحتوي على 400 ملقط حواجب و 500 جهاز براون سيلكيبيل و 7000قطعة كوتكستيار المستقبل ينسحب من مواقعه على الفيسبوكمطلوب موظف لتلفزيون المستقبل يقول وشششششخبر عاجل:انتشار العشرات في السرايا الحكومي حاملين المحارم بأنتظار بكاء السنيورةحركة امل و حزب الله سمحوا لسعد الحريري بالخروج من القصر لدقيقة فقط لشراء راس العبدأنصار الحكومة تطالب بهدنة اليوم لانو الطقس حلو والشمس قوية وبدن يعملو برونزاجانيمل بلانت تحقق في ظاهرة انقراض فهود طريق الجديدةخبر عاجل : فرقة الإسراء تسيطر على مسرح سوبر ستار و تقوم بأداء أغنية نصرك هزّ الدنيالمعارضة تطلق قنابل نواويّة ابتهاجاً بالسيطرة على بيروتورد الأن: إغتيال الأخوين سوبر ماريو و لويجي في محيط طريق الجديده وإستنكار شديد اللهجة لسوبر سوني

  10. Anonymous · · Reply

    It gives me a heartache witnessing what is going on in Lebanon, the recent times magazine was published with a poster of Lebanon VS the Arab countries on the cover page, it displays how all the Arab countries are building their palaces on the Lebanese ruins.My question is: Does that make our active politicians happy???

  11. Karin · · Reply

    Just stopping by to say HI! How are you guys doing?I like your humor a lot … always better to laugh than cry!

  12. Angry Anarchist · · Reply

    Hey Bashir, how’s it going ? It’s been a while since I last checked your blog… Just wanted to let you know that I’m back on the blogging scene (exactly 1 year after I stopped blogging!). 🙂http://politburo.elementfx.com/blog/

  13. Sophia · · Reply

    What’s wrong with the new Lebanese president ? Only his name…

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